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This month, I’ll kind of be hopping around to a number of
things I want to touch on, so let’s just dive right in.
First off, the continuing stupidity of New X-Men. Which, if
this keeps up, could be a column all it’s own every month.
Something like, "Why Morrison Sucks". Now, before this goes
too far, let me start off by reiterating for those joining the party
late, I do like some of Morrison’s work, mostly his creator
owned stuff, or that featuring all-new characters. His work in an
established universe just strains the suspension of disbelief, and
changes the characters into unrecognizable ciphers that suit his
own agenda, and aren’t the ‘real’ characters anymore.
I’ve come across many complaints about the X-Men already
being ruined before Morrison came along, and actually, that’s a
fair point. Unfortunately, Morrison has taken the current level of
the ruined state the X-Men, and gone above and beyond the
ruining call of duty and slammed the book deep into the pit of
ruinocity.
Before, you could at least point at a character, for the most
part, and say, "Hey! That’s Jean Grey! She’s a bit whiny, and
clingy, but that’s pretty much Jean!" Now, you’re not so sure.
She acts nothing like any previous version, did not evolve, and
was just suddenly replaced by this new character who’s got red
hair and boobs, and *might* be Jean, but you’re not really sure.
She says she’s Jean, but sure doesn’t act or even look like it.
Yes, the art still sucks mightily more often than not.
Now, we have a new character named Fantomex. Morrison
has gone on record as saying he hates characters whose
powers, looks, and name don’t mesh, in at least two out of
those three. So, what’s a Fantomex, and what does that have to
do with his powers and look? And what’s the deal with him
pouring liquid over his head all the time?
"Ooooh! I’m Fantomex! I pour orange juice over my head!
I am quirky! I am kewl! Morrison writes me! Love me!!"
Sorry, I’m a bit incensed over all this.
This brings me to Morrison’s other quirk that’s bugging the
crap out of me. His habit of having characters come in, and
spout off some strange sounding thing that, again, is just to sound
cool. Such as "Corporal Animal," who runs around saying such
witty, insightful things as "I am death given human form!" and is
said to not have any human thoughts of his own for the telepaths
to control. Which they then proceed to do anyways, wasting
minutes of my life, and pages of my comic.
So, Jean and Chuck are running around, mentally
commanding around soldiers, tossing ethics out the window
whenever it comes to humans, which they’ve been doing almost
his entire run, and reveling in this behavior. Then, when it comes
to mutants, they don’t do a thing, such as when Fantomex,
holding a disk that could save the dying X-Men team in some
tunnels, and they could snatch it out of his hand, or even the safe
he sticks it into, but don’t, for no plausible reason.
There are, of course, several possible explanations.
Fantomex is a mutant, and thus above reproach, but it’s ok to
be naughty and unethical to the humans, continuing the stupidity,
and mischaracterization that has been rampant in Morrison’s run.
Or, the characters are just too dumb to think of it. Again,
against character. Finally, it could just be that Morrison is a bad
writer, and needs the characters to do this, to show that his
character is either cool, or to tell the story he wants.
A writer who forces characters to behave
uncharacteristically is not a good writer, or just not understood,
he’s a bad writer who does not have a grasp of the characters,
or even care.
And, I’ve had it. This issue sitting in my hands is the last
issue of New X-Men I will be purchasing regularly until
Morrison is gone. I just don’t care to read about...whoever
these characters are. Let me know when the X-Men are
actually in their own book again.
For reference, almost everything above is found in just the
newest issue, and after the last one (see last month’s column for
that rant), it’s the straw that broke the camel’s back. Yes, these
last two issues pissed me off that much.
I was going to talk about other things, wasn’t I? Oh well. I
can sum that up pretty much with the following:
Casey is off Uncanny X-Men now! Yay! Can Morrison go
next?
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